In For It Now
by PrincessLeah80
Summary: "They were coworkers. They were friends. They were friends that occasionally slept together after a few too many drinks at the Leaky Cauldron." EWE, Dramione, rated M for gratuitous sex scenes. This is my WIP with no pressure story, so it won't have a definitive update schedule.
1. Chapter 1

They were coworkers. After years of animosity and just plain anger towards each other, they had finally been able to put the past behind them. They were coworkers. They were friends.

They were friends that occasionally slept together after a few too many drinks at the Leaky Cauldron.

Hermione always avoided telling Harry and Ron the last bit. It wasn't that they hadn't finally realized that the past was the past and they should move on. No, they had been civil to Draco Malfoy in the past few years. It was that, for all their growth on the subject of civility, the idea that she jumped into bed with the blonde at least once a month -and with great enthusiasm- might have the power to bring back such insults as 'ferret', 'git', and 'Death Eater scum'. And that would be completely detrimental to her day to day life.

Currently however, Hermione Granger was attempting to move enough to reach the vial of Hangover potion sitting on the bedside table. But between the arm that anchored her to the bed, and the ridiculously insistent pounding in her head, movement didn't seem to be in the cards any time soon.

She heard a low growl from behind her neck, and shivered slightly as she felt his warm breath graze her skin. "Hermione, I swear on Merlin's balls, if you move one more time I'm going to shove you out of the bed."

If not for the pounding head, she would have laughed. "Why did you let me drink my way through a bottle of Rosmerta's mead last night?!" she groaned into the pillow.

Her heart began to race as his hand trailed it's way from her waist to softly tease one of her nipples. "Because when you have Rosmerta's, you begin to beg for me to do absolutely filthy things to you."

She gasped softly, almost too softly to hear. "Let's be honest, I'd probably beg for them without the mead, anyway."

He hummed in a approval, his fingers abandoning her now hard nipple to play with her clit. Both of them were unsurprised to find her still wet from the night before. He began to rub slow circles, until she began to pant and moan, all while grinding his growing cock into her ass. She reached a hand down to guide his cock to her dripping pussy, and both of them sighed as he entered her.

He knew, as always, that she would be sore from the night before, and started off with slow and shallow thrusts. But she had no patience for that this time around, and began to play with her own clit, meeting hid every thrust and forcing him to go deeper. With a groan he grabbed onto her breast and began to pull her closer, forcing her further onto his hard cock.

"Fuck, Draco, yes," she gasped, shifting her hips so that he filled her up with no effort. "Please fuck me harder."

He chuckled darkly, kissing the back of her neck. "You're such a naughty slut in the morning," he said. Without warning, he rolled her onto her stomach and began to pound into her tight pussy, pushing her roughly into the bed.

Amid the creaks of the bed, her moans turned more into screams as he kept up a furious pace. The slapping of skin on skin was echoing off the walls, and she writhed against the bed, the sheets feeling deliciously smooth against her breasts. Her body began to tense as his cock brushed the exact right spots with every thrust. "Oh, Merlin, Draco, don't stop!"

He gritted his teeth and pushed her shoulders into the bed. "Cum on my cock, baby. Cum all over my cock like a little whore."

With a scream her orgasm rippled through her, hips bucking uncontrollably as her pussy clenched around his cock. He gritted his teeth, thrusting as deep as he could until her head fell forward onto the pillow. He laughed as she let out a tired sigh. "I think it's my turn," he said, rolling over to lie on his back.

Hermione rolled her eyes, but quickly knelt on the bed beside him and grasped him, still glistening from her cum. He closed his eyes until he felt the warm, wet bliss that was her mouth. He allowed himself a glance and almost came at the sight of her lips wrapped around his cock, unruly curls being held back by one of her hands, and the other wrapped around the base of his cock. His head fell back again as she moaned while taking him deeper into her mouth, and he threaded a hand through her curls, encouraging her to take him deeper. "Oh, fuck," he mumbled as she gagged once before taking him deeper, the tip of his cock sliding down her throat. She bobbed her head, and he groaned as her lips kissed the base of his cock, taking the length of him all at once.

"Oh, Hermione, I'm gonna cum," he growled, his fingers tightening in her hair. Feeling him began to pulse, she bobbed until just the tip was left in her lips before taking him as deep as possible again, his cum shooting down her throat. With a soft pop, she released his cock, sucked clean, and let herself fall back on the bed next to him. But not before grabbing the Hangover potion with her hand on the way down.

"You still need that?" he laughed as she tossed the contents back. "The sex definitely cured my hangover."

Feeling much more alert, she sat up and grinned at him. "You may feel better now, but when you're at work later and feel like you can't move, much less stomach lunch, you'll realize I made the right choice." She rose from the bed, heading over to her closet to pick out the day's clothes before heading to the shower, leaving him lying in bed.

He looked around in slight surprise. Usually their escapades brought them to his flat, in an almost unspoken agreement between them. She had never been too fond of his flat, saying it was too contemporary and not at all homey in the slightest one of the first times she had ended up at his. He had replied that he was a Slytherin and if she wanted homey she could go shag the Weaselbee for all he cared. She had responded with tackling him to the contemporary, black framed bed and shagging him until he couldn't form a coherent sentence.

But here he lay, in the midst of her sanctuary. Soft sunlight filtered through the window, illuminating the stacks of books that threatened to escape the confines of the bookshelf in the corner, the pictures of her family and friends that lined the dresser, and their shared clothes from last night strewn about the room. To his amusement, his briefs had somehow made it to the top of her vanity, and hung off the corner of the mirror like a flag in conquered territory.

He drowsily observed his surroundings, letting himself relax back into the sheets and blankets that lay bunched on the bed, and he observed the pictures on her dresser. Her parents, the two Gryffindorks (Malfoy smirked at the state of Harry's hair and the dirt smudged on Ron's nose), and a couple who he assumed was a set of grandparents. His eyes began to droop as the sound of the shower began to lull him back to sleep. As he gave in, he had a thought to remind himself to make sure a picture of him ended up on her dresser, dropped off inconspicuously the next time he spent the night, perhaps.

His eyes shot open. What?! No, no! He was NOT going to bring a picture, just as there would NOT be a next time in her flat. Next time she would come to his, and that would be the end of it, contemporary furniture be damned.

At that thought he groaned. There didn't used to be a thought about the next time. It used to be that they would jump in the sack, pretend it never happened, and then accidentally-on-purpose get inebriated enough to do it again. There was no planning. Never.

He was distracted by the sound of her humming from the shower. It was a muggle song, one she insisted on listening to more than a couple of times at work. She had brought in a turntable just for the purpose of introducing music to the bookstore, and he thought, mainly so she had an excuse to listen to the song. What was the bloke's name? Ronald Frank? No. Robert Francis? Yes, that was the one. She always seemed to have this song in her head at least once a week. He smiled at the sound of her attempt at a high note, which failed miserably, then shook his head. He was not supposed to smile. Malfoy's don't smile. Malfoy's were cool and collected and...once again the crack in her voice made him break out in a grin. He couldn't help but chuckle at how adorably amusing her singing in the shower was. His whole body went hot then ice cold at the thought.

Merlin, he was in for it now.

* * *

AN: Ok, so this was my first sex/smut scene in fanfiction, so be gentle. I know I should be working on Learn To Be Still, but I got some serious writer's block on that one and needed to get some kind of creativity going. I WILL be updating that one soon, promise. In the meantime, please review on this little oneshot! Who knows, I might make it into a multi-chap.

Also, the song I'm referring to by Robert Francis is called Baby Was The Devil. Look it up! He's an amazingggg songwriter.

~Princess Leah


	2. Chapter 2

It had been two weeks and three days since she had heard from him. Which, in Draco Malfoy-time, was absolutely unheard of.

She bit her lip and mused over this as she absentmindedly stirred her coffee, attempting to wake up and tackle the new Hogwarts legislation sitting on her desk. While it was true they had once gone three weeks without jumping in the sack (only because she was out of the country; the minute she apparated back to her flat, he was there, shagging her senseless before she could even think to say "hi"), he usually couldn't go more than four days without either snogging her against a shelf in one of the ministry broom closets, or feeling her up during a meeting. She scoffed at the thought of the last time he had done that. Despite her protests that meeting was with the Minister, and could he at least behave for once?, he merely decided to finger her until she came...twice. In his opinion, the more important the meeting, the more inevitable the orgasm.

But he hadn't done any of that. While he saw her every day and was completely cordial to her, he hadn't once even made a move that could be described as bordering on flirtatious. He was usually the dominant one in their beneficial relationship, but Merlin, she was ready to turn the tables a bit and jump him as soon as he walked into her office.

"Granger?"

With a start she jerked the spoon in her coffee cup. Before the coffee could spill across her desk however, Draco had whipped out his wand, casting a freezing charm and saving the legislation she hadn't even glanced at yet.

"Jumpy today." he commented, restoring her coffee to its rightful place with a flick of his wand.

She sighed and leaned back into her chair, already exhausted by her mere reaction to the accident he prevented. "You could say that." She glanced up at him as her thoughts from when he walked in flooded her mind. All too soon, she was picturing him sweeping everything off of her desk, attacking her lips with his and pushing her back onto the desk. She could just feel him shoving her skirt up around her waist as she unbuttoned his pants, and she felt herself get wet as she imagined him shoving her lace panties aside and thrusting his deliciously hard cock deep inside her, pounding into her with no pause as the desk rattled on its legs.

Hermione came back to herself as she heard him clear his throat, and focused to see him calm and composed, if not for the slight look of confusion on his face at her absence of mind. As she looked just a tad further, however, she could see the slight dilation of his eyes, the twitch of his fingers and the raggedness of his breath. "Sorry," she breathed, "I'm a little out of it."

He nodded with a small, polite smile. "I just came to pick up the key to the Auror case files. I would have sent an owl, but you know how Potter hates for the key to leave anyone's ownership other than by hand."

She chuckled before opening her desk drawer and handing over the key. "I'll let Harry know you have it."

"Thank you," he quipped with a nod as he walked out of her office.

As he closed the door, she lazily allowed her head to fall into her hand, and stared after him, puzzled.

He still wanted her. She just didn't know why he wouldn't do a damn thing about it. But Merlin help her, she was determined to find out.

**AN: I know, it's a short little teaser chapter. But this is kind of my stress relieving story, and it all just depends on the inspiration of the day. Though now that I'm living 5 minutes away from my boyfriend...well...inspiration comes a little more often. ;-) **

**Don't forget to review!**

**~Princess Leah**


	3. Chapter 3

It had been two weeks, three days and roughly four hours since he had last woken up next to her. And every second of it had been agonizing, horrible torture.

Draco sighed as he slumped into his chair, having just returned from her office. She probably had no idea how delectable she had looked right then, hair pulled neatly back into a clip, flyaway curls framing her face and bringing attention to the smooth, soft skin of her neck. It had taken every ounce of his willpower to not stride around the desk and pull her in for a searing, mind-blowing kiss while his hands roamed the curves of her body wrapped up in that satin blouse...

In a flash, he was out of his chair and pacing the room. This simply wouldn't do. He couldn't be hopelessly sighing after Hermione Granger! This is was starting to invade his every waking moment, and his sleeping ones as well. He had already woken up once from an especially vivid dream with an embarrassing, teenage-esque mess inside his trousers and staining his sheets. He had to get her out of his head, and fast. There had to be something he could do, anything!

He jerked to a stop mid-step, and took a sharp breath.

Of course. There had to be someone that could get her out of his system. His head was full of Granger; her sounds, the feel of her body beneath his fingers, the way she glowed as he watched her writhe beneath him. If he could just replace all of that, maybe, just maybe, he could cure himself of this.

He slowly sat down and pulled a file he had been too distracted to work on towards him. Yes, he thought, a smug smile tugging at the corner of his mouth. He'd cure himself of Granger once and for all.

* * *

Draco growled as he watched yet another unacceptable girl walk into the Phoenix, a new wizarding bar that had popped up down just down the street from the Weasley twins' joke shop. He raked his eyes over her thin frame, and couldn't help but be turned off by her pale skin and jet black hair.

It wasn't that she was hideous or anything of that sort. He just couldn't seem to get Hermione out of his mind, which of course led him to compare every blasted woman in the room to her. They were all wrong. No one had her golden skin. Not one of them had those brown curls that always seemed to get tangled in his hands when he was kissing her like he was a drowning man and she was the only source of air. Draco took a moment to breathe as he felt his slacks tighten just a tad at the thought of her, then exhaled as he calmed himself. But mostly, there hadn't been a single girl that had come in here with a figure that came even close to hers. After all, he was trying to forget her body. How could he do that without a body that was better than hers?

He slammed back the firewhiskey he'd been holding mid-air, and, sliding the glass back to the bartender, motioned for another. He just needed to loosen up, then he could focus on finding a witch to take home.

Five drinks later, and there was absolutely no other term to be used than "loosened up". He blinked slowly, enjoying the heady, warm feeling spreading from his chest and the tingling sensation at the tips of his fingers. As he once again took to looking out over the crowd for a target, he caught a whiff of a perfume emanating from whoever was sitting in the barstool next to him. Draco froze. He knew that perfume. Oh, Merlin, he knew that perfume. Trying to keep himself cool and collected, he slowly turned around in his seat, and inwardly cursed as he wobbled to a stop to face her.

There she was. Just sitting there in an emerald green, curve-hugging cocktail dress, with glittering, gold heels. Her soft curls were pinned back on one side as if inviting him to bury his face in the curve of her shoulder, like he had done so many times before. Between her smooth, perfect legs and the peek he was getting of a black lace bra in her cleavage, he was sure this woman would be the death of him.

She took a sip of her drink before turning her cool, expressionless gaze on him. "You've been avoiding me." She reached out to stroke his knee. "Why?"

He half-heartedly pushed her hand away, and turned back to face the bar. "I'd really rather not talk about this, Granger."

If he has been watching her, he would have seen the spark flare up in her eyes, the one that was a sure sign that her signature stubbornness and drive were about to get the best of her. It was the spark that so many people who knew her were cautious, and even afraid of. This number included Draco Malfoy, but it was far too late for him to escape it now.

She stood up and stepped closer to him, her chest grazing his arm with every breath she took in a subtle way that was simply maddening to him. His eyes shut involuntarily for a second as she began to hiss in his ear, her warm breath brushing against his earlobe. "If you have a problem with me, Draco Malfoy, I have every right to know. And if you refuse to mention them then I'm going to treat the situation like any other time we've been miffed with each other and make it to where you're begging to tell me what exactly is on your mind!" With a quick, cat-like movement she was suddenly palming the growing erection he had been trying so desperately to control.

He threw back the rest of his drink and somehow managed to stay solidly upright as he spun off the barstool to face her. With a growl, he slammed down enough galleons to pay for his tab with one hand and pulled her flush against him by the waist. Not missing the smirk she was unsuccessfully hiding, he quickly snaked a hand into the curls at the base of her neck and pulled her in for a searing, bruising kiss.

Oh, damn it all to hell, he couldn't stop now. Not when he could feel her heartbeat thrumming through her dress, and her cool hand was threading its way into his hair. Not when her mouth tasted like apples and skin smelled like oranges and roses.

With a gasp, he broke the kiss and grabbed her by the wrist, leading her out of the bar and into the cool night air. He was too far gone to berate himself for what he was about to do, but he was also just aware enough to realize this was exactly what she had planned for him to do all along. Gods, she knew him too well. He had made a mistake the night he has kissed her for the very first time; from that moment, she was destined to know too much.

"Well, Malfoy, why have you been avoiding-"

Draco pulled her into his arms again. "I told you, I'd rather not talk about it," he let out in a rush, before capturing her lips once again and disappearing with a pop, taking her with him and leaving behind only the scent of oranges and roses.

* * *

**AN: First off, I want to apologize profusely for taking so long to update, but I've been trying to get into the swing of working an 8-5 job while maintaining my relationship with someone who typically works 10:30-7:30, not to mention handling my stress and anxiety...anyway, you don't want to hear any of those excuses. Regardless, sorry! I feel horrible for leaving all of you lovely followers waiting, and even more horrible that I don't exactly write the longest of chapters. On another note, I caught a lack of continuity between the first and second chapter, and I've decided it's too much of a hassle to repost it, so let me just say here, Draco and Hermione DO work at the Ministry. I'm surprised no one mentioned it, but in the first chapter I had mentioned them working in a bookstore. Oops. ANYWAY, please review and I hope you enjoy, and feel free to yell at me if I take too long to update!**

**~Princess Leah**


	4. Chapter 4

With a small pop, they appeared in Draco's room, and almost instantly he had her backing up, her legs hitting the edge of his bed. He groaned into her mouth as she sat on the bed, hitching up her skirt to allow him to settle in between her legs. Fire. She was fire, with heat radiating from every inch of her skin. It was intoxicating, maddening, and he almost couldn't take it, she was so intense.

He jumped as he felt Hermione graze against his painfully hard erection. He was so lost in her that he hadn't noticed what quick work she had made of his shirt, and how she was now unbuckling his belt and pants. He shifted back and leaned her towards him, allowing her to shimmy his pants and boxers down his hips before he pulled her sinfully delicious dress over her head. He stumbled as she pushed him away from the bed to kneel down in front of him, clad only in a black lace bra, matching thong and her gold heels.

He groaned as she reached out to grab his cock and swirl her tongue over the tip. Hermione quickly fell into a rhythm, taking more of his cock with every bob of her head. His hand went forward and he twisted his fingers into her hair, half to steady himself and half to guide her into a slower pace. Draco gritted his teeth, attempting to keep himself from fucking her mouth until he came. With a growl, he tugged her away him, then brought her in for a wet kiss before he pushed her somewhat roughly onto the bed. She looked like a goddess - a genuine Aphrodite - with her curls splayed out across his bed, her chest heaving and her eyes dark with pure lust. Hooking an arm under each of her legs, he pulled her closer until she was perched at the end of the bed, and upon releasing her legs, slid a thumb under the side edge of her panties and pushed them aside. Draco aligned himself with her and leaned forward to kiss her hard as he slid into her dripping wet pussy as her legs automatically wrapped around his back to pull him closer and her lips releasing a breathy moan.

He gasped into her mouth, trying to calm himself as his cock was already throbbing erratically from the sheer sensation of her tight cunt squeezing him for all he was worth. Oh, sweet Merlin, this wasn't going to last long at all. Even with the whiskey coursing through his veins and numbing his senses, he was far too sensitive to hold out. He opened his eyes to glance at Hermione, who was intensely staring at him. "Draco," she sighed, her breath ghosting across his lips, "Please."

_I never had a chance_, he thought as he crashed his lips down into hers. "Fuck, I love you," he whispered.

He thrust fast and hard as he reached down to rub the bundle of nerves between her legs. From the gasping moans emitting from her mouth, he was sure she was near undone, but he needed her to cum before him and he was already so close...

As his thrusting became more and more erratic, she suddenly arched her back and let out a scream, her tight pussy squeezing him and sending him over the edge. "Hermione," he moaned out as he emptied himself inside her. A few thrusts more and he slid out of her, flopping down onto the bed beside her before his legs gave out.

Hermione panted and grinned to his right. "Oh, sweet Circe, that was good," she said to the ceiling. "I mean, I figured it would be on the explosive side of the spectrum because you've stayed away for so long, but bloody hell! It was such a good shag you even got carried away there for a second, didn't you?"

He went perfectly still next to her as his heart began to race and a sour taste filled his mouth. He had never intended for those words to slip out, but it was as if he had been laid bare by her presence. _Fuck_. His heartbeat was so loud in his ears that he couldn't hear what she was saying, and he had to concentrate to understand.

"...and that's okay, I know you didn't mean it. So, everything back to normal? I'd like to see you next week, unless I have a hot date-"

"Get out." He felt like a large stone had been dumped onto his chest. She thought it was a mistake, a phrase to be brushed off. He willed himself to stay still as he felt the bed shift beside him. Draco was sure he had gained her attention now, and that she was staring at him, probably with that brow furrowed and her lipstick smeared out of the lines. He couldn't see her. Not now.

"...what?"

"Get out!" he growled. He struggled to control his breathing, knowing that he couldn't hold himself back much longer.

He heard her scoff loudly. "You've never kicked me out before. Something has obviously got your pants in a twist, and I want to know what it is! I can't keep shagging someone who keeps going hot and cold-"

"Fine!" he yelled, suddenly sitting up and wrenching his arm away from his eyes, but still looking everywhere but her. "You want to know what my problem is? I'm in love with you! I love you and I mean nothing to you in comparison. I've been trying to get away from you, to forget the color of your eyes and the feel of your skin and the taste of your damn perfect lips, but you keep luring me back in, ignoring my every wish for you to leave me alone!" He sighed loudly, finally looking her in the eye. "Granger...Hermione...I just can't see you anymore."

Draco had never seen Hermione as dumbstruck as she looked in that moment. After a moment of searching his face, she dropped her gaze and shifted uncomfortably towards the edge of the bed. "You're serious."

He swallowed hard, trying to ignore the way her breasts pushed together as she wrapped her arms around her waist. "Yes, I am."

"Well," Hermione said softly, "I'm sorry, Malfoy, but I don't feel the same way. I - I'm sure you know that."

He hoped she didn't catch the flinch he couldn't reign in and ducked his head. "I know. That's why I think it's best if I stay away from you for the time being."

Hermione nodded, and rose from the bed. He watched as she quietly pulled her dress back on, and made her way to the door. She paused, placed a hand on the doorframe, and looked as though she was going to turn and say something, but continued on through the door.

Draco's gaze fixed on the spot where her hand last touched the doorframe as he listened for the soft pop from the next room. It seemed to be a long moment before he heard it in the distance, making him release a shuddering breath that he hadn't known he was holding. He let himself fall back onto the bed, and he stared up at the ceiling with dry, wide eyes until morning, ignoring the scent of oranges and roses clinging to his skin.

* * *

**AN: So I'm back with a chapter. Not forseeing many more for this story, as I'm going to go back and rescue Learn from its hiatus. Review if you wish! ~Princess Leah**


	5. Chapter 5

It had started the Monday after her disastrous seduction of one Draco Malfoy. What normally would have turned into a second round of adult-oriented fun two nights before had instead ended with her Apparating to her flat, alarmingly confused. She had never seen the blond so vulnerable. Of course, he tried to hide it with his mask of indifference, but she liked to think she had known him well enough to see when he was truly emotional. She had spent the rest of the weekend nervously cleaning her flat, wondering how on earth she had missed the fact that Malfoy had fallen in love with her. She knew they had been seeing a lot of each other, but she had assumed the _benefits_ that had developed during their friendship had been completely devoid of romance. Though,she had thought as she scrubbed her bathtub, it was true that she couldn't remember Malfoy going on a date in quite some time. And, if she took the time to think about it, their strictly after-cocktail romps had turned into next-morning banter rather often in last few months. But that had just been convenience and friendship, right? As the weekend had worn on, her confusion slipped into anxiety over Monday morning's work proximity. How was this all going to work? Should she pretend nothing had happened, and maintain the cordial relationship they had developed as coworkers? Or should she give him a wide berth, since it was obvious he wanted space? Did she even know how to be merely polite to someone she had seen naked more times in her life than anyone besides herself?

With these questions and a pounding heart, she had walked into work on Monday morning, bracing herself for either clinical politeness or a cold indifference, but instead she found...nothing.

There wasn't a usual flash of blond as she walked onto the Department floor.

There was no sign of him as she entered the break room for another cup of coffee during her (and usually his) morning break.

Around midday she heard a knock on her office door, and quickly straightened up in her chair, heart racing. "Come in," she called, wincing at the sound of her strained voice.

But it was Harry.

"Hermione, just a moment, I wanted to introduce you to Eleanor," he said, gesturing to a petite brunette behind him as he walked into her office.

"Oh, hello!" she said breathlessly, trying not to seem surprised. "It's nice to meet you."

"Likewise," said Eleanor with a warm smile.

"Eleanor's a new transfer that you'll be working closely with. Haven't got much time to chat though, she needs to head down to Smithers' office to finish up the usual paperwork," he said, sounding rushed. "It's all been a little hectic today, with Malfoy's spot to fill."

"Malfoy?!" Hermione squeaked. "Wh-what do you mean? He left?"

Harry ran a hand through his hair, mussing it even more than usual. "I'm not sure if he's technically left yet. He's taken an indefinite leave of absence. Sent an owl over the weekend saying it was an emergency and he would send word when he could return to work. He's saved up a lot of paid leave, so he could take off anywhere from weeks to months, and he made it sound like it might be the latter." Harry's brow furrowed. "I figured you, at least, would have some insight to what's going on with him."

Hermione shook her head. "No, he didn't mention anything," she mumbled quietly, dropping her gaze to her desk.

Harry nodded. "Well, I'm sure he wouldn't take off without a good reason. Anyhow, we've got to get going. I'll catch up with you later." He and Eleanor waved a goodbye, leaving Hermione frowning over her second cup of coffee.

She couldn't deny she felt a little hurt, and a bit ashamed. Draco apparently was so unsure of his ability to see her that he'd rather disappear without a single word of reassurance that their friendship could survive. But worse, his leaving might have been avoided if she had just realized sooner that their shagging on the weekends had gotten to be too much for his emotions to handle. Hermione simply felt responsible, though her logical mind was arguing it might have been unavoidable regardless.

Her usually sunny disposition dimmed considerably after the news of his absence, though she tried to pretend otherwise. Her appearances at the bar with coworkers dwindled in the course of the next month, and her usual glowing skin grew dull from her obvious stress and lack of sleep. She had stopped going out to dinner with Harry and Ginny, or brunch at the Burrow on Sundays, and feigned illness when Ginny and Luna tried to set up a girl's night out, which baffled everyone including her. She didn't know why she suddenly felt disinterested, though after a while she chalked it up to guilt over her inability to return Malfoy's affections. And with that guilt came the unending, unshakable listlessness.

* * *

She continued on like this for three months, until Ginny and Luna forcibly demanded her presence on a night out. Ginny was convinced that Hermione needed a good, drunken pick me up to shake her from the funk she'd been wrapped in, and Luna, oddly silent on the matter, dutifully helped Ginny as she wrestled Hermione into a short, snug, blue dress and strong armed her out the door.

And after that, everything just felt so..._fuzzy_.

She supposed it was the flowing firewhiskey, and the chasers of mead that followed every steaming shot. The club that Luna and Ginny had dragged her to had taken on a shimmery glow, and her inhibitions had finally dropped to the point where she was smiling as they danced under the green lasers and the magical swirling strobe lights, a thin sheen of sweat covering them and the rest of the glittering crowd on the dance floor. The lights had begun to shine brighter and bleed into each other, a usual surefire sign that Hermione was on her way to being thoroughly pissed.

She had to admit, this felt so _good_. In fact, the blissful numbness that came with every shot had her feeling better than she had in months. As she shimmied and reached for the pulsing lights above, she felt powerful, invincible even. Hermione finally felt alive again.

She slowly registered two hands slide onto her hips, and instinctively leaned back to grind against whoever had slipped behind her. After a moment she glanced towards Ginny still dancing nearby, who grinned encouragingly after thoroughly eyeing whoever was dancing behind her. Hermione smiled back, and continued to move her hips in time with the music and the person behind her.

* * *

She was a little blurry on the details of how it had happened, but Hermione was suddenly being snogged within an inch of her life in a loo stall.

_A loo stall._

She wasn't normally like this, as everyone would expect from Hermione Granger, but she couldn't deny that it was so fun to just ignore her reserved approach to snogging random strangers for once and just take the plunge. She had to admit, his lips were doing marvelous things on a sensitive spot on her neck, and she loved the feeling of his body snug between her legs, her skirt hitched up far enough so that he was flush against her with no resistance. She gasped as he ground his erection against her, and clumsily tried to move in sync with his thrusting. He moved back from her neck to capture her lips in a searing, urgent kiss, and her thoughts went hazy once more as their kisses blended together into a continuous moment…

...And then, as he moved down to her neck again, sending shivers down her spine, she gasped out a name, opened her eyes and expected to see blond hair and pale skin to go with the name, but only black hair and brown eyes came into focus. Before she could form a coherent thought she pushed him, _hard_, so he had no choice but to let her go, and she half slid down the wall before her legs found the ground.

"Oh, bloody hell, I'm sorry! Are you okay?" He made a move to help her up but she held up a hand to stop him.

"I- I'm fine, I just...I can't do...this." She bit her lip as the tiny stall spun around them. "I didn't mean to lead you on, I just…"

"No, no, it's okay." He smiled, his eyes slightly glassy with liquor, and she observed sadly, in a different time, she might have wanted to see that smile again. "Do you want me to give you a minute or find a friend for you…?"

Hermione shook her head, rising from the floor. "I'll just go, if that's okay. Thank you, though, for understanding." He gave her another smile, and she ducked her head as she stumbled noisily from the loo back into the throbbing lights of the club.

Gone was that wonderful alive feeling she'd had earlier in the night. The music was overwhelming now, the lights glaring down at her, and she shied away from the touch of every dancing person that crossed her path. She didn't want to be out in the world anymore, she wanted to be home, tucked away in bed, waiting for some miracle that would never happen.

Merlin save her, but _she missed him so much_. She couldn't hide from that anymore. Some part of her, some piece of her heart had gotten so accustomed to his presence in her life, that she feared she would carry the loss forever, however small or large it came out to be. She wouldn't call it love, but she felt _something_, and it was obviously something she had been ignoring for far too long. The damage was done, now. Draco Malfoy was possibly a possibility no longer. In fact, he was probably somewhere at that exact moment, getting over her with a prettier, younger brunette, or a tall redhead or short and curvy blonde, and her blind attempt at staying detached was to blame. Her chest ached at the thought.

She blinked as Luna came into focus in front of her, looking her over with a sympathetic gaze. Hermione was appalled to find her eyes blurring with unshed tears, and tried to paste a grin on her face, but her friend would not be fooled.

"Come on, Hermione!," she yelled over the music as she grabbed Hermione's hand, though she sounded as calm and serene as ever. "You need to be home for these emotions."

* * *

**AN: Not a very 'hot' chapter, but necessary to continue the story.**


End file.
